Going For It!

Well, as previously mentioned, we joined the YMCA in town, and I love, love, love it! I have been there a LOT.  This week, I went Mon, Tues,Weds, Thurs (but I didn't work out - just met with my personal trainer to set things up), Fri, and today, so that makes 5 workout days this week. :)  Last week, I went everyday too. :) I am having so much fun!  I end up doing the "various" setting on the treadmill (the one with the TV attached!!) - it typically has good hill work - for 30 to 40 minutes.  I have it set at a steady 3 or 3.5 (whatever that means) for speed usually, but today, I did some intervals.  It wasn't for the whole time, but it certainly was for a while. I did one minute running at 4.5 - 5 for speed, 2 minutes walking at 3, even on the "hills". It made the time go pretty fast, that is for sure, and I burned 350 calories, plus 54 calories on the rowing machine. That is a pretty sweet workout for me! :)

I am really trying so hard to do this & make it a lifestyle change. I am making a real effort to eat better foods & avoid eating out - ESPECIALLY avoiding fast food. I think that stuff has things in it that are addictive for me - if I have it once, I crave it so badly it's insane, and that will last for a few days after I had it the first time - maybe until it is all out of my system? I really think it's the MSG that I have heard is in nearly all fast food... and if the burger joints know it's addictive, then I think that is pretty shitty that they put it in there. Just my humble, addicted opinion.

I had the pleasure of meeting Sarah, my personal trainer, on Thursday evening.  She seems to be extremely nice & also very motivated & knowledgable. I really like her! We will meet Tuesday for my first "kick ass" session (I'm sure it will be my ass getting kicked... but I'm ok with that.), and I can't wait!! I'll let you know how it goes. I'm hoping we can do the Nautilus machines so I can add that into my work-outs.  Sarah also told me that she wants me to have Tim hide my scale. I'm kind of addicted to that too, I guess. I just like to know where I'm at with my weight... but I guess I'm gonna have him hide it anyway. She wants me to just learn my body & appreciate what I am doing for myself & work on my body image issue.  It's funny, 'cuz looking back, even when I was 133 lbs, I never really FELT thin... even when I could fit into a size 5. Is that just me, or is it societal pressures? Who knows, but either way, it has messed up my perception of my body shape & size. I try to see myself with "outside eyes", and it never works. The only time I ever thought I looked thin was Hallowe'en 1992 when I was dressed up as Madonna. I looked like Madonna (during the "Vogue" years) to myself & also to everyone at the party I was at. I knew I looked thin because Madonna was (is) thin & beautiful, but apparently it only lasted for that particular snowy (we got 24" overnight) night. :) Just some food for thought. I need to have a better vision of the person I am.

I think I'm gonna have Tim start taking a pic of me each weekend to see if I can notice any differences. I will probably post them here so you can see it too, if/when there are changes. :) I'll add it in when I get one taken - I have to find something I can wear each time so we can see if it is fitting differently. I hope the changes are noticable. I feel like I look a little more toned/leaner, but maybe my perceptions are off. I don't have a whole lot of confidence in my assessment of myself at this point. One of the guys at school, who is a dear friend, thought I had lost a bunch of weight over the summer & recent weeks though, so that was nice to hear. :) I hope I actually do soon!! I'm stuck at 232.8ish. And now I won't know for 6 - 8 weeks, since I don't have a SCALE!! : /  But when I keep doing what I'm doing at the Y, I'm bound to start really losing. I can't wait!! :)

Steppin' in it...

We collect antique lures, as mentioned in prior posts.  We also organize a Antique Lure Swap Meet in the WI Dells, and we have been at the same location for that show for the past 17 - 18 years...  This past couple of years have been headache after headache with the hotel, dealing with changing personnel, people not knowing what the heck is going on, having one event manager quitting the week before our show & not even telling the replacement people that there WAS a show or how to set up for it, and the list goes on... needless to say, we have looked for other places to host the show at, but no luck.  When a different hotel tells you that to rent the show space will cost $8000, it's just not feasable. It's ridiculous.

Last Friday, we found out through the grapevine, (not even from the hotel) that the hotel closed with no warning. Seriously? SERIOUSLY??? I am so mad.  All they have is a red screen on their website stating that people who have reservations have to contact THEM to get $$ back, they won't contact you. So now we have 120 people, or more, that were coming to the hotel & who may or may not get that money back because the hotel charged up-front.  I am praying they get their money back - if the hotel doesn't even have the option for people who have paid up front to actually STAY there, how can they keep your money? But hey, when you, as a hotel, get busted stealing electricity from the city, you know the $$ is gonna have to go to pay for that stolen electricity, right? I have a bad feeling this may not be resolved quickly.

Sorry for complaining, but all of this leaves us in scramble mode. Life wasn't busy enough, I guess! : P  My dad is trying to line up a hotel that will block 120 rooms & give us a decent price so that we can at least salvage room trading, where people sell out of their rooms & the rest walk around & buy lures.  Normally this happens the night or 2 nights before the show. Now there is no show, so will people still come? I have no idea. Yuck - what a mess. And right now, figuratively speaking, that mess is tracked across my living room floor, and through the house... it is all we can talk and worry about... and I just want it over with. I keep getting phone calls from members of our club, and rightfully so, but I have no answers yet. Hopefully, with the sunrise will come some information so I can at least tell them what is going on and what they can expect from this "show" that is no longer...

On a good note, I joined the YMCA & I absolutely LOVE going there. I mean, when you have a treadmill with CABLE TV right on it... how does exercising get any better?? :)  I swear if it was Shark Week or if Deadliest Catch marathon was on, I think I could stay on that machine & work out for HOURS.  Who knew cable tv was the motivation I have been seeking? :) I also went on the recumbent bike - that was weird, but it was great after I was all done with everything - I got off the bike & my legs felt like rubber. I'm guessing that was a good workout! Altogether I worked out for a solid 50 minutes. If I can do that consistently, surely there will be some positive changes in my body shape, size, & weight, right? Right??

Ahhh, life is good. Even just thinking about my workout is getting those endorphins working at making me happy... and right before bed too, so maybe I'll have some great dreams tonite. :) Love it. Thank you, YMCA. I love you... let's make this a long term relationship, okay? <3 Our first date rocked. :)

Magic In The Trees

I'm looking at sun-dappled leaves & noting their changing shades. *sigh*  It's a paradox - hot sun, new colors telling me the change of seasons is approaching. Where has summer gone??  This is always a time of anticipation of a new school year... and depression, with my all day, every day of summer spent with my kids disappearing. I cherish these days so much, it isn't even funny!  With school starting, I'm still in denial.  It just doesn't seem real.... wasn't I just waving at departing busses yesterday??

Fall & spring are my favorite seasons of the year. With fall comes the crisp cool weather at night & the warmer days, but not too hot.  It seems like the stars show up brighter against the night sky & aren't softened
by that summer haze that seems to be around so much lately.  In the fall, I always find myself thinking about when I went back to finish my degree in LaCrosse - the night before I left, we sat out in the driveway at my parents, looking at the stars, and it is one of those moments in a lifetime that, for some unknown reason, leaves a lasting memory. The night was dark & the air was cooling after a warm day, so the breeze was warmed by the heat rising from the blacktop, but we would feel the wisps of coolness woven in from the already-cooled-down woods behind the house.  We talked about what we were hoping for, and how nervous we were for some of our classes, hoping they weren't too hard & that our roommates wouldn't suck (2 did, 2 didn't, and of course, I didn't - 5 girls, one apartment).
 I wish I had known then about some of the things in life would go once I drove away from home the next morning... I would have made a point of running in to Chicago some weekend to see Uncle Bob before he was no longer with us. I wish so much that I would have been able to give him one last hug & hear him laugh one last time before that sad day. I would have tried harder in my stupid PE Methods class so I could have offset my partner's lack of effort & had the 4.0 I deserved instead of the 3.975 that I got and am still mad about (I need to learn to let go a little more, huh?). I would have argued with the PE Methods teacher when he gave me the A- that I DIDN'T deserve, but which my partner so generously gave to me through her idiocy. (Don't worry, I'm sure she will never see this blog, and even if she does, she won't remember me... right, Lisa? LOL...) I would have kept running & working out so a healthy way of life was MY way of life.  That one would have been pretty key...

Speaking of the weight loss / exercise journey, I'm joining the YMCA on Tuesday, and I'm really excited about it! It should work out PERFECTLY with our family schedule, regardless of what hours Tim is working, because we will be able to go right after school while we are still in town, out & about.  You know how it is - once you are home from work, you just don't want to get back in the car & go to work out... so we will go every day for an hour to an hour & 1/2. That will be fun, and a new experience for all of us!
We went to the Y once last winter to go swimming, and I was amazed at the facility they have & how much they have going on, then I checked their website & they have a TON of things to do!!
I think Makenzie will want to do the gymnastics & Ryan will want to do whatever sports he can get into, plus, they can take swimming lessons there. :) That will be great for us.  I'm not so sure what I will do - probably stair climbers & treadmill & some nautilus/weight work.  I'd like to get more evenly toned - my arms suck, but I can see the definition in my leg muscles. I'm using arm band things and they are HARD, but it helps...
I also want to lose 20 - 25 lbs by Christmas.  That goal seems huge to me - what a difference it will make to my body image & obviously, my health! :)  One thing I would like to learn to do is take a favorite recipe & know what I can substitute to make things healthier, but still have some of the things I love to eat, and still lose weight. I will have to see if there is a place to find stuff like that - surely there must be a website for that. If there isn't, I think maybe we should start one!! :) 

Well, off to clean the house one last time before the end of the carefree days.  I started yesterday with the kids' rooms (spent 4 hours - think I left that a little too long!) & our room. Tim has started picking up the living room now, so I'm sure my computer time needs to come to an end & folding the laundry needs to get started (AGAIN)... the never ending cycle - no pun intended!

Cutting the Strings

Ok, maybe not quite cutting the strings, but it sort of seemed like it... our laptop died 2 days ago. It was fine in the morning, and I closed it up to have some fun at the movies & the park with the kids & a friend.  We got bacck home around 4 & I popped up the screen to see what had been going on in cyberworld while I was enjoying the real world & nothing happened. So I shut down & restarted. Nothing happened. WTH?? Tried again, got mad, & Tim took over before I threw the damn thing across the room in frustration. Then it was me trying to keep HIM from throwing it across the room in frustration... and that was it.

We have tried everything we can think of to get it running enough to try to do SOMETHING with it, but now we turn it on & then it turns back off by itself in less than 2 seconds, so no luck. Farewell, my computing friend - it was fun.  I appreciate you being so flexible & wireless - the first time I had the pleasure of walking around computing with no wires attached... and that was sweet. I should have named the computer Pinochio - "I've got no strings to hold me down..." I learned (against my will) to use the touchpad & use it skillfully. Eventually, I didn't even want a mouse anymore - talk about a 180. I'd love for all my computers to have no mouse - the one at school trips people more often than not, because my students come over by the computer desk & it isn't up against the wall - the wires are just "out there" in spite of my attempts to control them with velcro strips.
I started my blog with you, Facebooked with you, & farmed on MyFarm too much with you (but my kids like "farming" & have fun with that). We also learned that buying "open stock" from Best Buy doesn't necessarily mean it was just a display & not previously owned by someone else - you were owned by someone before us & apparently returned... I wonder if it had anything to do with that defective wireless issue?
 I also learned that HP is a wonderful company who stands behind their product. I totally like HP. :) Best Buy... well, we ended up there, but I'm still not a huge fan.  The whole paying for an extended warranty thing is baloney, in my humble opinion, simply to help them make extra money. How many of their products need to be fixed & use the warranty? If it's that many, they need to represent & sell better products. If it isn't that many, then it's just a cash cow, right? Nice to take advantage of your customer... if that is the case I'd rather just buy a new computer, because this one is under warranty for a year & after that, either I pay (the amount I would have paid for the warranty) to fix it, or I pony up a couple hundred more for a new computer, like we just did, and get one that is relatively updated.  Of course, the one we liked was the last one, but "we can purchase the open stock" if we want... um, no thanks. However, the guy who helped us did a good job of finding us the deal that was advertized in their flyer, but not displayed in the store... whoever you are, thanks. We really appreciated your help... :)

So now I have a new Compaq Presario that I'm writing this on... and I'm trying to remember all of my "favorites" so I can run life & finances from my little corner of the couch. Thankfully, I took the time last week to write all of my important websites in my Organizer with all the sign-ins & passwords. I would recommend that you do this if you haven't - it's a good back-up & safer than another method I have used at times - putting the password in my favorites. Not smart! Maybe I had a premonition this crash was coming... but it was a good thing I had written everything down, simply because I had all the websites written down & it made it easy to re-enter them on this computer. I knew the stupid passwords anyway because I use them every day. Crazy. :)

Anyway, rest in pieces, HP computer... funeral, ritual cursing of the deceased, and smashing with hammers took place yesterday.  Off to Recycle Heaven for you... or is that like, computer reincarnation instead of Heaven? Either way, it's been real & it was nice while it lasted, but it's time for me to move on.

And my exciting new love, Compaq, welcome to the family... hope you can stick around for a loooonnnnggg time - we have a lot to do together!! :)

Mudslide: An Uncontrolled, Crazy Ride

August. It's August & I'm getting depressed.  I always do, when the last month of Summer arrives. *sigh* Since I am a teacher, these 3 months of Summer are treasured, beloved, and full of a heady freedom to spend every day with my children.

I love what I do - teaching is not so much a vocation, or job, as a passion... and I am passionate about it. : )  I want my students to be the very best people they can be & to learn as much as they possibly can in my class. I want them to be as passionate about learning as I am about teaching, although that rarely happens.  As I look forward to a new year, I have this anticipation mixed with the wistfulness tied to the end of another Summer.  I am hoping to be the best teacher I can be, and it plays in the back of my mind all the time - things I can change, improve, tweak to make the lessons better, more understandable, more interesting. But the biggest problem for me is the motivation that many students are lacking.  There is little intrinsic motivation to complete work outside of my classroom & I don't know how to instill that so the motivation lasts beyond the bell at the end of the hour... but I'm working on it & not giving up.  I keep thinking if I can present lessons that are intruguing & inspire deeper thinking, the students will want to "figure it out". : )

As this summer draws to a close, our lives are in turmoil, although we keep it together quite well.  I'm dreading the regimented, bell-run life that is coming, and how it will affect my life/exercise/diet.  It's not my very favorite way of running my life - I'm a free spirit. : ) It is difficult to work out after school because I am always exhausted after the day & it also depends on Tim working. 
Tim has been a substitute custodian for the last 6 - 7 years in the school district where I teach & was home with our children until they started school. Last year, Makenzie started Kindergarten, so we thought Tim would find a full time job, but we kept hearing rumblings that there may be retirements in the custodial staff, so Tim kind of waited... and there were retirements, and there is one position open.  We are waiting to see what happens, and that leaves so very many things up in the air, unknown.  We don't know the hours he'll be working, the days, or how it will affect us as a family.  I am praying it will be, at the very least, just 11 - 7 pm, not 3 - 11, or we will never see him, especially if he has to work every Saturday as well. I don't know if I can take it if I never see Tim... and if the kids don't get to see him every day... I will literally go crazy. *sigh*  I'm a free spirit, but "wait and see" is such a hard way to live everyday... I imagine the relief when the decision is made & done & over with will be unbelieveable.  Additionally, the financial burden we have been under will evaporate ~ at least a little... and that will be lovely in itself!

I weighed myself today, and the scale told me 231.4!! I have not seen that number since 2002.  Now that I "put it out there", I'll probably gain 3 lbs, but I was so dang happy to see it. I'm down about 5 lbs from the start of July ~ I just pray I can keep going!! 5 more lbs in August would be amazing & would put me at my pre-pregnancy weight of 226. I haven't run for 2 days - it sucks.  Thursday was rainy & sucky outside, so I just didn't go, although I should have. Yesterday was a CrAzY day of running & running & running - I had to go to town to drop off an overnight bag, run to school, run to a friend's house (only to realize they are on a trip - duh!), tried to stop by another friend's on the way home - they were out shopping, and then after calling to chat with my Mom, running home to get Makenzie & then bringing her to my parent's house so she could sleep over there.  Whew!!! By the time I got home, it was after 9 & dark - too dark for me to feel safe running by myself, and Heather wasn't able to go last night. So, with that said, I will need to get out there tonight.  I'm thinking I need to join a Health Club in town so I can use it right after school. Let the investigation begin! I need something that has a playplace for the kids while I exercise, or it isn't going to work, for I am sure I will have kids every single day after school if Tim gets a job... I'll have to see what I can find.

And now, I need to get this house in order & live it up while I still have some Summer days left! My carefree days are dwindling down to give way to the excitement of the start of school... and when it does, let the stress, and the fun, begin!

Holy Barfbags, Batman!!

Monday night we had pizza for dinner - my laziness/forgetfulness kicking in - I forgot to pull out something "good" from the freezer.  Tim picked up pizza, including the thin crust supreme requested & I was so excited, since I haven't had that in ages! Well, dinner was served, I waited the same amount as I always do before running, then set out on my mile & 1/2 route. O.M.G. - that was seriously the worst idea ever. I ran once before after pizza, and chalked up the agonizing torture to just starting my running routine. Not so much - I really think it was the pizza killing me slowly!
I started out (listening to a great Michael Jackson song on the MP3) & it felt like trying to run through water - my muscles just wouldn't feel good about running, my hands were swelling up from all the sodium in the pizza (I am assuming), and I was just gasping to breathe. I finally gave up on making it the whole way & had to walk after a mile, then I was running/walking the rest of the way because my body was rebelling.  At least I didn't hurl all over on the run, even though it probably would have made me feel better...
So pizza as we know it is off the menu for me. : / Sad... I like supreme pizza - all the stuff on it is my favorite- especially when it is all together! Clare gave me a recipe to make a lower-fat, healthier pizza... I think I'm going to have to try that to see how it is, because I LIKE pizza, even tho it hates me! : P

I weighed myself today & I'm down to 233.3. So THAT is sweet! Still working on it, obviously.  Only 7 lbs to go before I am at my pre-pregnancy weight before Ryan came along.  It's been 9 years since I've seen that weight!! I'm trying very hard to be patient... but I'm not a patient person.  However, yesterday was Makenzie's birthday (she is SIX!!! Wow!!) & I'm now well below my pre-pregnancy weight before Makenzie. :) So... life is good, when you take the time to realize it & give thanks!!

Yesterday was hotter than blazes outside, so I didn't run. I couldn't even bring myself to walk it yesterday! Heat & I don't work well together, especially since I have an extra layer of insulation... but tonite I will be running again. I hope it isn't too hot again, but after the storm went through last night, I think it cooled off at least a little. I guess even if I go slow, it's better than not going at all.

The Day the Ice Disappeared

We watched all the ice piling up as the wind blew it to our

shore - it hit peaks of 10 - 15 feet high before spilling over

to make new piles.

Ryan & Makenzie wanted to climb on the ice,
but settled for pics in front of the piles. : )

Last spring (2010) we were up at the lake on THE day that the ice "went out" or disappeared. It is one of the most amazing things to watch & listen to - there is this constant breaking glass clinking noise because the ice crystalizes into these long shards of ice all connected on the top  bottom, but with space between them.

All it takes is a little wind, and the ice starts actually blowing across the top of the lake (very slowly) and when it hits shore, it all piles up & breaks into the ice cyrstals. And it all happened in a day that it disappeared! The ice was probably 10 - 15 feet tall and it went out into the lake in a mound for probably 50 - 75 yards, and then throughout that day, the waves chewed away the ice mounds and it all just disappeared.... it was so cool!!

When we talked to the neighbor, they told us the ice was completely gone by 6 that night, with just the crystals floating near the shore, melting.  Where does it all go so fast? I think it melts very quickly, since the water is warmer (obviously) than the ice, but it is simply breathtaking to experience!  One more reason to live on a lake if you can, I guess...

And then we could hear the music of the waves on the shore again.  One of my favorite sounds... I hope to see the ice go out every year when we go up in April, but I've only been so lucky one & 1/2 times - the 1/2 was when it disappeared way out on the lake & on a different shore, but I didn't actually finish seeing it go out - it did it in the night, so there were waves in the morning! And just the day before, we were wading in the cracks in the ice wearing Dad's waders... I think we were crazy - what if the ice would have shifted?!?  But kids are dumb & fearless, so we did it anyway. :)  I think spring is simply awesome...

Looking out from the neighbor's boathouse roof - it was
an incredible sight, with ice going out in rows at least 1/2
a football field in length and anywhere from 2 - 10 feet high!

At about 3 or 4 pm on the same day, all those piles had
disappeared, washed away by the waves... it was incredible!
We had to leave before that last bit was gone, but it was
completely gone by 6 pm that night, from what we heard.