Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Holy Barfbags, Batman!!

Monday night we had pizza for dinner - my laziness/forgetfulness kicking in - I forgot to pull out something "good" from the freezer.  Tim picked up pizza, including the thin crust supreme requested & I was so excited, since I haven't had that in ages! Well, dinner was served, I waited the same amount as I always do before running, then set out on my mile & 1/2 route. O.M.G. - that was seriously the worst idea ever. I ran once before after pizza, and chalked up the agonizing torture to just starting my running routine. Not so much - I really think it was the pizza killing me slowly!
I started out (listening to a great Michael Jackson song on the MP3) & it felt like trying to run through water - my muscles just wouldn't feel good about running, my hands were swelling up from all the sodium in the pizza (I am assuming), and I was just gasping to breathe. I finally gave up on making it the whole way & had to walk after a mile, then I was running/walking the rest of the way because my body was rebelling.  At least I didn't hurl all over on the run, even though it probably would have made me feel better...
So pizza as we know it is off the menu for me. : / Sad... I like supreme pizza - all the stuff on it is my favorite- especially when it is all together! Clare gave me a recipe to make a lower-fat, healthier pizza... I think I'm going to have to try that to see how it is, because I LIKE pizza, even tho it hates me! : P

I weighed myself today & I'm down to 233.3. So THAT is sweet! Still working on it, obviously.  Only 7 lbs to go before I am at my pre-pregnancy weight before Ryan came along.  It's been 9 years since I've seen that weight!! I'm trying very hard to be patient... but I'm not a patient person.  However, yesterday was Makenzie's birthday (she is SIX!!! Wow!!) & I'm now well below my pre-pregnancy weight before Makenzie. :) So... life is good, when you take the time to realize it & give thanks!!

Yesterday was hotter than blazes outside, so I didn't run. I couldn't even bring myself to walk it yesterday! Heat & I don't work well together, especially since I have an extra layer of insulation... but tonite I will be running again. I hope it isn't too hot again, but after the storm went through last night, I think it cooled off at least a little. I guess even if I go slow, it's better than not going at all.

Monday, July 26, 2010

The Day the Ice Disappeared

We watched all the ice piling up as the wind blew it to our
shore - it hit peaks of 10 - 15 feet high before spilling over
to make new piles.
Ryan & Makenzie wanted to climb on the ice,
but settled for pics in front of the piles. : )
Last spring (2010) we were up at the lake on THE day that the ice "went out" or disappeared. It is one of the most amazing things to watch & listen to - there is this constant breaking glass clinking noise because the ice crystalizes into these long shards of ice all connected on the top  bottom, but with space between them.

All it takes is a little wind, and the ice starts actually blowing across the top of the lake (very slowly) and when it hits shore, it all piles up & breaks into the ice cyrstals. And it all happened in a day that it disappeared! The ice was probably 10 - 15 feet tall and it went out into the lake in a mound for probably 50 - 75 yards, and then throughout that day, the waves chewed away the ice mounds and it all just disappeared.... it was so cool!!

When we talked to the neighbor, they told us the ice was completely gone by 6 that night, with just the crystals floating near the shore, melting.  Where does it all go so fast? I think it melts very quickly, since the water is warmer (obviously) than the ice, but it is simply breathtaking to experience!  One more reason to live on a lake if you can, I guess...

And then we could hear the music of the waves on the shore again.  One of my favorite sounds... I hope to see the ice go out every year when we go up in April, but I've only been so lucky one & 1/2 times - the 1/2 was when it disappeared way out on the lake & on a different shore, but I didn't actually finish seeing it go out - it did it in the night, so there were waves in the morning! And just the day before, we were wading in the cracks in the ice wearing Dad's waders... I think we were crazy - what if the ice would have shifted?!?  But kids are dumb & fearless, so we did it anyway. :)  I think spring is simply awesome...
Looking out from the neighbor's boathouse roof - it was
an incredible sight, with ice going out in rows at least 1/2
a football field in length and anywhere from 2 - 10 feet high!
At about 3 or 4 pm on the same day, all those piles had
disappeared, washed away by the waves... it was incredible!
We had to leave before that last bit was gone, but it was
completely gone by 6 pm that night, from what we heard. 

On the Water... aka: Heaven!

We went to my favorite place on Earth last weekend ~ my parent's cabin near Hayward, WI.  I LOVE going there. It is like, a lifesaver to a drowning person!  It makes me relaxed & soothes me so that I slow down and just exist with our family. :) I can't really describe how beautiful it is...

This time on our trip there, we did some shopping & bought Makenzie her "running shoes" - one pair for everyday use & a set for P.E. class - they require a separate pair that stays at school & is only worn for P.E. I totally think this is stupid, but whatever. Thank God, they were on clearance, so the damage wasn't as bad as it could have been!  She was running around in them when we got back to the cottage & I said, "Wow, your new shoes are SO fast!" and Kenzie responded, "Mom. It isn't the shoes, it's my legs!" :) Wise little one!

My new fabrics...  These colors are awesome!! : )
On our shopping trip, I stopped at River's Edge Quilt Shop (& Antiques) - one of my favorite quilt shops. Gail, the owner, has some WONDERFUL fabrics - I love all her batiks... but I talked myself out of them this time... I'm sure I'll be going back there the next time I'm at the lake! But this time, I bought a little bit of fabric to go with some fat quarters I bought this spring - they are the "2010 Hoffman Challenge" fabrics which are all creams, aquas, and bright greens. Totally my colors! (I'll upload some pics if you want to see them, but the pics probably won't do them justice!) They are so pretty, in my humble opinion, but Tim doesn't think so. I showed the fabrics to him in the care & he just made a face like, "Ewww, really?", but didn't really say anything. Funny!! I told him once the fabric makes a quilt, it will be awesome!  He knows I'm right - it's amazing what putting fabric together with complementary colors can do! : )

My big boy Ryan was sick, poor guy - fever of 101 & just not feeling well on Saturday, so he stayed home & napped, but by Sunday morning he was on the upswing. : ) He got to go out fishing with Tim on Sunday & he caught a smallmouth bass & 3 perch, so he was absolutely thrilled.  Ryan is a good little fisherman - and he is funny because he doesn't just want to catch a bunch of small fish (panfish), he wants to catch BIG fish (walleyes, big smallmouths, etc), so he knows that he needs to be patient.  I wish that would translate to being patient for dinner too!!!

Tim spent time fixing things, as usual. : ) He is amazing & can do anything... He found the tiny hole in the shingles & patched it, so now the roof isn't leaking anymore.  I was totally fretting about that, and Dad thought we would have to replace the roof, so that is a HUGE relief. Tim thinks we can put off reroofing for a couple more years - whew! That is good news!!  He also tore apart the baseboards and filled the place the mice were coming in with steel wool, then put the baseboards right down to the floor, so hopefully the little buggers will stay outside where they BELONG! There must be a huge population of mice this year, because there were 2 in the traps when we got there this Friday & the week before we caught 3 mice, and one of them was in our VAN! : P ick... sometimes I miss the cats that the neighbors used to have!!

Macatawa Musky Frog  LOVE IT!!
My articulated turtle decoy - head, legs, & tail all move!!
Tim spoils me...
Tim also worked on the data spreadsheet for the people attending Wisconsin Dells Fishing Lure Meet that we run... Tim does so much work to make sure it comes off without a hitch! We collect antique (and some contemporary) fishing lures & are part of the National Fishing Lure Collector's Club (NFLCC).  This is a passion that we kind of "inherited" from my dad - I was the only one in our family that would sit down there in his office/fishing lure room and listen to his "lectures" on the baits. : )  He was always so good about explaining things to me - the differences that help determine what baits you have & how old they are. It is a pretty amazing hobby, and it helps document an interesting piece of American history that you certainly don't learn about at school! I like to collect Ice Fishing Decoys - they are amazingly cool!! Tim has found a couple of really great contemporary carvers who make absolutely GORGEOUS decoys & he has gotten me some for birthdays/Mother's Day/Christmas. I got the most amazing Macatawa Musky Frog & I also wanted a turtle so, so much, and I got one from him this year - I LOVE it!! : D

We all got out fishing on Saturday night - Ryan thought he could handle it, and I'm sure the medicine helped a great deal.  I love fishing as a family. Just being in the boat together is nice, even if we don't catch anything, which essentially, we didn't. There was a ton of boat traffic on the lake this weekend, so all of our "usual spots" had people on them, and we hate being right on top of everyone - it's rude. So, we ended up going where apparently, there were no fish. : )  We ended up on one spot that is kind of fickle - the fish come thru, but it's always a crap shoot what time. I think we were too early. Anyway, Makenzie caught a very nice 15 inch smallmouth bass, the only fish to get in the boat, only to be released back into the water. : ) And then she proceeded to "get bored" and complain, complain, complain, COMPLAIN until we couldn't take it anymore, so we did our "one last cast" (unless someone catches something, which we didn't) and headed for the dock and an early (9:15) bedtime.  Even Tim I were sleepy early on Saturday!

Leaving the lake is always sucky.  It invariably happens that we leave on the nicest day of the weekend/week that we are there. Yesterday was no exception to that rule. Sunny, low 80's, light breeze, and not a cloud in the sky. It figures.  We have people who were using the cabin this week, and so we had to pull the boat out of the lake so they could use the boatlift.  The one good thing about that was it gave us an excuse to take an hour long boatride on a gorgeous day. : ) We went down around the islands, which always makes me frustrated when we don't have a fishing pole in the boat because it looks like the perfect place to fish, and then just randomly flew all over the lake as fast as the boat can go.  Windy, cool, and pretty. I love seeing the loons - there were a LOT this time, and that is good news, as far as I'm concerned! Finally, we headed for home to take the boat out, pack up, clean up the cottage, and leave for Fall Creek. : ( I would live at the lake if I could!! 

I ran 1.5 miles with my wonderful neighbor, Heather, when I got home.  It was really nice to have someone to talk to, even though I was gasping a lot to maintain a conversation! We made it the whole way in about 22.5 minutes, but after 2 days not running, I don't think that is horrible, for me. : ) Thanks, Heather!!  It is so nice to run with a friend! I haven't weighed myself yet this week, but I'm sure I probably haven't lost anything. Story of my life! ; ) I'm thinking about doing "2-a-days" for August & running the 1.5 both morning & night.  I wonder if it would actually make a difference? I'll let you know! : )

Friday, July 23, 2010

Draggin' It... And It's All Uphill

So being thin has been a goal/dream/hope of mine since, like, FOREVER, and I was, once or twice.  The first time I realized I wasn't "ideal" sized was when I was in about 4th grade. After that, forevermore, I worried about my size, shape, and weight.  I've never been "good enough".  In high school I was thin for the first time - I was in track for 3 years & cross-country for the last 2 & ran enough to make it happen - but I still had a complex.  No special diet per-se, just a lot of running & a 17 year-old's metabolism. I was 142 lbs when the coach came around, and I don't remember why, but we had to give our weights, and I was so embarrassed to tell my weight because everyone elses was so much less (10 - 25 lbs under mine). But looking back, I'm pissed, because I was actually just fine, and I looked good & I was healthy. I wish someone could have validated that for me back then - it really could have helped, I think.

Then I went to college & gained the freshman 15... or 25. How does one do that with ramen noodles (ick)? I suppose the Taco Bell runs at 11:45 pm didn't help. And then my sophomore year in college, I became thin again - I got down to 132ish.  I worked out every night, running a couple of miles, riding the bike for 10 minutes, then doing Nautilus weights for about 1/2 hour... and I was bulimic. I was really good at hiding it, if I do say so myself - the people closest to me had no idea. I started over Christmas Break, lost 15 lbs in a month, and decided that was brilliant, since it was easy & I could still at least eat the food before purging it, so I continued purging (not so much binging, just eating my meals, then "getting rid of them") until the following summer, and every once in a while for years & years after, when "the need" arose & I panicked & was compelled to by some sick feeling that I totally screwed up my eating & had to fix it fast.  Even now, 20 years later, I get that strange urge & somewhere in my head is that voice whispering to me, "Hey, it worked before..."  However, it is not something I am willing to give in to anymore. I am afraid of it & what it will do to me.

Sooo, with all that said, I'm on the quest to lose the weight AGAIN, for the 3rd time, but this time forever. 3rd time is the charm, right? My amazing aunt, Clare, who is a personal trainer is helping me do it right, and I love her even more for helping me be healthy, not just thin.  I've kind of come to grips with the idea that I will never be "society-thin". Never.  (Thank you, media & super-models who have corrupted our little and not-so-little girl's thoughts about "ideal" - thanks for giving us unrealistic "ideals" to shoot for. I hate you for that. Just thought you should know.)  But, in spite of stupid societal ideals of what girls & women should look like, I have decided that I'm doing what is good for me. And I will lose weight & be the best me I can be. It took me 15+ years to gain all of this weight - I am just hoping it doesn't take that damn long to come back off. Freakin' fat. : p 

Here goes the public part of this.  I started running June 25th, weighing 236.4 lbs (Wow - really? Putting that right out there? Guess it's motivating, if nothing else... other than embarrassing! I guess it isn't like I'm shocking anyone with the fact that I'm overweight, right? Like, "*Surprise!* I'm fat!"  *gasps all around* "No WAAAYYY!!!"). I had to start with running 3 blocks, walking one, then gradually erased the walking part until it was all running on July 8th - made it the whole mile. Seriously, if you are even THINKING about getting out to start exercising, it isn't cheating to do what your body says you can do.  You don't need to be a marathon runner on the first day off the couch.  Just don't be a wuss and pretend you can't do it at all- gotta push yourself, ya know... but get out & do something and work your way up to where you want to be. Who cares what anyone else thinks? Do it for you! I am, and to hell with anyone who laughs at my fat girl "sprints". Eventually, I'll do better than a 14 minute mile. :)

Today my angel, Clare, informed me that I need to run further TONITE. So I did. :) I ran 1.5 miles (in 21.01 minutes), as directed, made it the whole way without stopping, and actually kinda felt like I could run more! Wooo, go me! I need to figure out a 2 mile route - I don't wanna just run the 1 mile loop twice. : p I need new horizons to chase, new vistas to view... LOL... or maybe doing the same thing all the time is boring! And last time I checked (this morning) I was down to 234.4, so I've lost 2 lbs (in a month... which kinda sucks, but it's probably my own fault through eating wrong).  I'm trying to cut out carbs & eat more green food & healthier foods... but I'm sure I'll get into the whole food thing another time.  Until then, I'll be running & trying & not giving up... and I'll post again soon. :)

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The Riverhead ~ Beginnings

I find myself starting a new adventure with this blog. 
I don't know what actually possessed me to try this, but it's kind of like starting that diary, diet, or new craft - it's interesting, you think it's a good idea at the time, & so... you just do it. :)  I don't have any major direction for this blog... it just is what it is, I guess.  Stream of consciousness, daily occurences, life happening... we shall see what it evolves into...